Monday, November 29, 2010

Two glorious HB's still!

So this week has been the week from h*ll. It's what I like to call D week, otherwise known as death week. Week 8-9. When I lose my babies. But I'm making it. Holy crap, I'm past week 8 and into week 9. Today's US was great. Two HB's, even got to see the one baby move a little. So awesome. Back on wednesday for my miracle IVIG. I can't wait. Is it July yet?

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today I am thankful for my family and hopeful for my family to be. Please let this work out. An important US tomorrow morning. I've got to make it past this week. I have to. I will.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Good Ultrasound/Bad News

So I had my US yesterday, and I love the US tech. The reproductive doc I'm seeing only sees high-risk, multiple loss women, so the whole staff knows how high-strung we are. So the first thing she says, is there's the HB's! Then they measured great at 170BPM. There is a bleed that they think is causing the spotting, so I get to be on bed rest already. I have a feeling that's going to be a recurring theme for this pregnancy. Hey, I'm actually planning for the future of this one. Let's just say I'm hopeful. Ivig is the wonder drug, and I'm getting more tomorrow.
Now the bad news. Dr. Kwak says because my ANA's are positive, and very high (1280 titer), it will be an uphill battle. Not an impossible one, just uphill. But I like battles. I'm a good fighter. And my babies will have to start out being fighters themselves. They've come this far. Just a little further to go. I see a safety net in our future soon.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Spotting Sucks

So there's nothing that strikes fear in the heart of someone who's miscarried like blood. Specifically on the TP. It's not a lot, and the doc said it's likely from a bleed I have between the sacs, but it's still scary. Frightening. Horrifying. But there's nothing I can do. I'm taking all the meds recommended by my doc, I got the IVIG approved and infused on Friday, and am now on bedrest. Now I wait. Luckily only until tomorrow when I have another US at 11:30. I'm praying everything's going to be OK.

Friday, November 19, 2010

The best doctor in the world!

Thank you to everyone who commented on my last post. Some of you I read, some I can't wait to check out and follow. I am a blogger addict. I love to follow people and hear their stories. I'm just not good at commenting. Too shy I guess. But now that I know what a difference a comment can make, I may just start more.

Now on to my appointment today. Still two heartbeats! Yeah!!! Double yeah! I am now seeing one of the leading reproductive immunologists, Dr, Kwak-Kim. And she is the best. Every single woman dealing with infertility, recurrent loss, one loss, high risk pregnancy-should see her. She is a welcome change from the usual doc who thinks you have "bad luck" or it was "meant to be". She used to study under Dr. Alan Beer and still does leading research into the immunologic cause of miscarriage. She has me on a regimen of Metanx (prescription folic acid), baby aspirin, prednisone, progesterone in oil and IVIG. She wants to be as aggressive as possible. That is great. A huge change from my last pregnancy when my other reproductive immunologist did nothing. Ran two tests, and prescribed nothing. And I lost the pregnancy. Enough said. Dr. Kwak said the same thing. So-tomorrow I've got to try and get IVIG covered by insurance and get that "miracle drug" pumping. It's got lives to save!

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

OMG!!! OMG!!!

So I had to say it twice because there are two babies!!! AHHHH!!! Twins, I was not expecting that at all. And two perfect HB's. 150 and 147. I guess that explains the high beta number. Now I pray. Pray that these guys (or girls) stick around. Pray that my brand new job that I start tomorrow will understand I might need some time off for drs appointments. Pray that the reproductive immunologist who I believe can help me can get me in soon. Because I am quickly approaching the 7-9 week time that I lose my pregnancies. But today, tonight, I have two babies with glorious HB's. Tomorrow's a new day to worry about, right?

Ultrasound-Heartbeat or no?

I go in one hour to see if my little bean has a heartbeat. There should be one there. My HCG from yesterday was a whopping 159,000. That's awesome! At 7 weeks, I am actually at the high end of the scale for once. Now the bad news, today I feel horrible sick. And not the nausea that caused me to think I had cancer and wasn't pregnant. Only an infertile would be so stupid. Or I guess it's more naive. When you've had more pregnancies than living children, you tend to think of the worst I guess. Bad things happen. All the time. No, I've got a cold, and I'm paranoid that means that my immune system is all out of whack and killing my baby as we speak. But I guess there's nothing I can do. But hope for the best. Hope for that little flicker on the screen. Hope that I won't need surgery next week, because this one's different. I hope!